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If you use affirmations, your labor can be pain-free.

"Ludacris! The only way to have a pain-free birth is with drugs!"

False.

Drugs are a pain management tool, and they come with physiological and emotional side effects.

The power of positivity, or as some call, woo-woo shit, is also a pain management tool, and the side effect is confidence, resilience, and a positive mindset. You'll experience all labor sensations, be able to manage you mind through contractions, and allow yourself to have the most earth shattering out-of-body euphoric experience possible that only the birthing person can experience.

Does it really mean you'll have a pain free birth?

Yes, kind of.

While labor is not 100% painless, it can be managed so much so that the sensations are regarded as pressure more so than pain.

Affirmations

Just like negative self-talk turns into a negative self-image and even foundational beliefs about oneself, positive self-talk can have profound effects.

Positive affirmations work on the subconscious level. So, if your a skeptic this might feel silly. I #challenge you to write one positive saying about yourself on a sticky note or on your mirror today. Slap it up there and say it out loud, roll your eyes, and then say it again.

While really picturing what your saying, and believing in your words is much more powerful, this is a practice. It takes time to believe that you do if fact "got this". Take this one day at a time.

Other ways you might get some affirmations:

Ask your partner or a friend to send you a text that really boosts you up. Something like....

"You are an excellent mom"

"You got this"

"You are a powerhouse"

"You were made for this"

"I am ok"

Remember, your affirmations don't need to be deep or exquisite. Don't worry about them not meeting a certain standard. After all, what benchmarks are you using to judge your affirmations? Your affirmations are personal and therefore, incomparable.

When writing your affirmations, think ahead to what could be helpful during labor and even beyond labor. No one was ever upset to have been over prepared for the test.

Labor Affirmation Examples

"I can do hard things"

"My baby will come"

"My body is strong"

"I am a Goddess"

"I am ready"

Postpartum Affirmation Examples

"I can do hard things"

"We are okay"

"I am capable of handling this"

"I will survive this"

"I will crush this"

"It's okay to have these feelings"

"I provide nourishment to my baby"

"This is the opposite of lazy, I've never worked harder"

The Power of Distraction

Your brain is only capable of processing so much at one time. Typically the thing we are aware of being the most concerning thing is what the brain focuses on. Try these tips to distract your brain from the contractions.

1. Slapping a leg

2. Nipple stimulation

3. Sex or erotic massage (maybe ask your guests to leave the room)

4. Focusing so intensely on breath work and affirmations

What you hear and see

Why is it that you fear the birthing process? Is it because of movies, wives tales, friends stories, or other things that have created a fundamental belief that birth is the most painful thing a woman can undergo.

Thats the most common underlying issue. You believe it will be painful, thus it will be.

Don't let me fool you, its not a walk in the park. There is some pain involved, and this pain is manageable. You will feel contractions, and you can breathe through it, have a sense of humor through it, get real close with your partner

Did you know your cervix operates on energy?

Radical Acceptance

What do you normally do and say to yourself when you just finished an emotionally fueled conversation with your best friend and your driving home, sobbing?

"God I'm so stupid for crying!"

"Ugh, why am I even crying, it sucks being a girl."

or maybe in a rage-tastic moment you provide some good old-fashioned expletives.

These methods are your flight or fight responses driving your behaviors and thoughts.

Have you tried pumping the brakes and accepting that this situation is hard, sad, troublesome, or rage-inducing, and let these emotions flow without judgement, without giving them additional fuel?

Next time your in this spiral, stop yourself and say

"I am sad, it is okay to cry."

"Crying is a normal response to this"

"My tears are valid"

"My anger is valid"

"It is okay to be upset, I can feel it in my [stomach, chest, shoulders, etc].

These same steps can be taken when you're in labor.

"These are contractions"

"These last for 1 minute, I can do anything for one minute."

"I am having a hard time with this one"

"This one is strong"

Try to avoid the word pain, but if it is painful, say it to acknowledge it and then move past it.

"This one hurts, and I will get through it."

Remember, you do, in fact, have this under control!

And then BREATH!

In for 4, out for 6. The magic to this formula is not about the number. The magic here is You are exhaling longer than you inhaled for. And, this is not a race. Do your one-Mississippi's if you must. You aren't breathing to "get over" this. You are breathing to slow your brain down, and bring your brain back online. So take your time. There is ALWAYS time to slow down.

My favorite mantra

"I am doing my best" on the inhale,

"and letting go of the rest" on the exhale.

Meditation is not the absence of thought.

it is about the ability to find your anchor, whether that's a breath, and affirmation, or something else, and redirecting your attention back to that anchor, repeatedly.

Your Cervix Responds to the Woo-woo

Did you know that the cervix will open and close based on how you are feeling? If you're feeling safe, relaxed, comfortable, and open to the experience of birthing your child, the cervix will dilate on its own.

The moment you feel fearful, or the energy is just off the cervix closes back up to protect the baby. It's the mother inside the mother!

Hopefully you've added some tools to your tool bag to deal with labor and beyond using woo-woo stuff!

If you'd like to delve deeper into this topic, I suggest this article published by Yvette Barton at Pregnancy, Birth, and Beyond here . In that article they talk about how there's such an incredible connection between the mind and body. By keeping a positive outlook, you can actually handle stress better, manage pain more effectively, and overall, have a smoother birthing experience. The blog even shares tips on how to create your own affirmations. Make them personal, use the present tense, stay focused on positive outcomes, visualize your success, and practice them regularly.

Published November 5, 2024, by Katie Douglas at Wild Wonders Doula

Special thanks to BEST Doula Training, for reiterating the power of woo-woo shit! <3